<p class="ql-block">秋迪，我最親愛的女兒，</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block">今天是你的 27 歲生日。祝你天堂里生日快樂。</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block">在過去的 26 年里，你的父母、你的姐姐和你的朋友們都期待著在你特別的日子里給你送去愛與祝福。年復(fù)一年，在你的一個個生日里珍藏了許多美好的回憶。2018 年 5 月 23 日你 21 歲生日時，一場多么盛大的派對，去年你 26 歲生日時，又是一場簡單而溫馨的家庭慶生聚會。</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block">然而，2023 年11月6日凌晨，當(dāng)我們遠(yuǎn)在上海時，傳來一個晴天霹靂的消息。在與抑郁癥長期斗爭后，你選擇結(jié)束自己的生命。突然間，我的世界崩塌了。</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block">自從你走了，我們努力去理解，不斷尋找答案，同時繼續(xù)消化失去你的痛苦，尋找前行之路。然而，所有的一切都極其艱難。正如當(dāng)你的麗艷阿姨關(guān)切我們平安時，我含淚的回復(fù)：“我的心已碎成了千萬片，真的不知道如何將它們重新拾起來，恢復(fù)完整?！?lt;/p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block">自從你走了，悲痛使我們的人生旅程變得如此孤獨(dú)和孤立。通過對親人自殺的家庭提供支持與幫助的機(jī)構(gòu)，你媽媽和我與其他喪親父母取得了聯(lián)絡(luò)。我們這些以最痛苦的方式失去美麗孩子的父母，懷著同樣的感受和情感，相互扶助，彼此共情與陪伴。</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block">自從你走了，除了安排追悼會外，我們還努力促進(jìn)公眾對心理健康的認(rèn)識，并在生命熱線（Lifelife Australia）上設(shè)立了悼念網(wǎng)頁。截至今天，生命熱線已收到近 50,000 澳元的捐助 - 這是他們從一個悼念網(wǎng)頁收到的最高的捐款。這給了生命熱線更多的資源去提供 24 小時危機(jī)幫助和自殺預(yù)防，使不再有人會像你一樣面對最黑暗的時刻。</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block">自從你走了，你媽媽慢慢地但逐漸地重返工作崗位，你爸爸就讀于第三年齡大學(xué) (U3A)，開始學(xué)習(xí)西班牙語和其他治療和冥想課程。你姐姐也決定在 8 月回到澳大利亞，這樣家人可以再次團(tuán)聚互相支持。</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block">自從你走了，你媽媽和我猶猶豫豫但最終還是繼續(xù)之前預(yù)訂的新西蘭之旅，并與朋友們一起在米爾福德步道上進(jìn)行了為期 4 天的徒步。雨中，四周山巒上千萬條瀑布飛流直下,恰似我們心里流淌的思念的淚。在皇后鎮(zhèn)時，我在你去年 7 月滑雪時住的公寓樓前的大街上徘徊，希望在那里見到你。在 Skyline 觀景臺，我們想起你和全家一起來過這里。相同的皇后鎮(zhèn)和瓦卡蒂普湖的景色頓時變成一個觸發(fā)因子，無聲的淚水再次奪眶而出。</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block">自從你走了，整形和重建外科主任、副主任以及前主任告訴我們，所有團(tuán)隊(duì)成員對你都高度評價與認(rèn)可。他們還提議設(shè)立一個以你名義的獎學(xué)金，支持那些年輕醫(yī)生參加科學(xué)會議，幫助他們的職業(yè)發(fā)展。還有Leong 教授也寫信告訴我們，你作為合著者之一的學(xué)術(shù)文章已被接受發(fā)表在著名的同行評議的期刊上，他特別感謝你的重大貢獻(xiàn)、你的辛勤工作和奉獻(xiàn)精神。</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block">自從你走了，你的阿德萊德朋友 Sharissa、Amayar、Issy 和 Nick 兩次前往你辭世的地點(diǎn)圣雷莫（San Remo)，緬懷并慶祝你與他們共同分享的的美麗人生。幾天前是 Sharissa 的生日，他們又一路開車去了圣雷莫，在那里與你一起度過。今天，你最好的莫那什朋友 Cherry 和 Nicolle 和我們一同去了圣雷莫。我們選擇了一個地方放一個小紀(jì)念牌，并沿著喬治巴斯海岸步道來感受你。真正的朋友永遠(yuǎn)不會分離，也許會在不同的時空里，但在心里卻永遠(yuǎn)不離不棄。</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block">我最親愛的女兒，在今天這樣的日子里，我們很容易陷入殘酷的悲痛循環(huán)之中，然而，我們在努力控制悲傷，因?yàn)榫拺选⒆鹬嘏c慶祝你的一生更為重要。</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block" style="text-align:center;"><i>記憶的葉子輕輕地飄落</i></p><p class="ql-block" style="text-align:center;"><i>我們輕輕地拾起并珍惜</i></p><p class="ql-block" style="text-align:center;"><i>看不到，聽不見</i></p><p class="ql-block" style="text-align:center;"><i>你卻總在身邊</i></p><p class="ql-block" style="text-align:center;"><i>如此思念，如此愛戀，如此親密無間</i></p><p class="ql-block" style="text-align:center;"><br></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block">無盡的愛</p><p class="ql-block">爸爸</p><p class="ql-block">2024年5月23日</p><p class="ql-block">~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~</p> <p class="ql-block"><span style="color:rgb(22, 126, 251); font-size:15px;">孩子，望著你漸行漸遠(yuǎn)的背影，爸爸心碎了</span></p> <p class="ql-block"><span style="color:rgb(21, 100, 250); font-size:15px;">孩子，你永遠(yuǎn)在我們心中</span></p> <p class="ql-block">【Since you’ve been gone】</p><p class="ql-block">- A letter to my daughter on her 27th birthday in Heaven</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block">Trudy, my dearest daughter,</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block">Today is your 27th birthday. Happy heavenly birthday.</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block">At this time over the past 26 years, your parents, your sister, and your friends were looking forward to sending you lots of love on your special day. Years after years we have treasured so many fond memories on your birthday celebrations. What a big party was when you turned 21 on the 23rd of May 2018, and what a simple but warm family celebration we had on your 26th birthday last year.</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block">However, in the early morning of November 6, 2023, the news was broken to us when we were far away from you in Shanghai. After a long fight with depression, you chose to end your own life. All of a sudden my world collapsed around me.</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block">Since you’ve been gone, we have struggled to understand and kept searching for answers, while continuing to process the raw anguish of the loss, and trying to navigate this new reality without your presence in our life. This rocky road has proven so hard because “my heart was shattered into a million pieces and I really don’t know how to pick them up to become whole again” as I wrote to your Aunty Liyan when she checked in with us.</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block">Since you’ve been gone, our grief and journey in this life became so lonely and isolated. Your mum and I have connected with other bereaved parents through Support After Suicide Program. We, the parents who lost our beautiful children in the most traumatic way, share the same feelings and emotions and supportively reach out for compassion and companionship.</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block">Since you’ve been gone, apart from arranging memorial services, we also made big effort to honour your life by promoting awareness of mental health and setting up a memorial tribute on Lifelife Australia. As of today, Lifeline has received nearly $50000 dollar donations - the highest amount they received from one tribute page. This gives Lifeline more resources to provide their 24-hour crisis support and suicide prevention so no one else has to face their darkest moment like you experienced.</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block">Since you’ve been gone, slowly but gradually your mum returned to work and your dad enrolled in the University of the Third Age (U3A) and started learning Spanish and other healing and meditation courses. Your sister has also made a decision to come back to Australia in August so the family can be together again to support each other.</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block">Since you’ve been gone, your mum and I hesitantly proceeded with the previously booked travel to New Zealand and joined our friends for the 4-day walk on the Milford Track. In the rain, thousands of waterfalls on the surrounding mountains are rushing down, just like the tears of longing flowing in my hearts. When in Queenstown, I wondered along the street near the apartment block you stayed for skiing last July and wished you were there. At the Skyline viewing platform, we recalled you were there together with the family previously so the same view over the Queenstown and Lake Wakatipu instantly became a trigger and then the silent tears rolled down our faces once again. </p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block">Since you’ve been gone, the Director, the Deputy Head, and the former Director of Plastic and Reconstructive Surgery of Monash Hospital have shared with us that you were highly regarded by all the team members and also proposed to establish a scholarship in your name to support those young doctors to attend scientific conferences for their career development. A/Professor Leong also inform us a paper you were one of the co-authors was accepted for publication in a reputable peer reviewed journal and he particularly would like to acknowledge your significant contribution, your hardwork and dedication.</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block">Since you’ve been gone, your Adelaide friends Sharissa, Amayar, Issy, and Nick went to San Remo - the place of your passing twice to remember you and celebrate the beautiful life you shared with them. A few days ago, it’s Sharissa’s birthday, they drove all the way to San Remo again and spent their time together with you there. Today your best friend Cherry and Nicolle from Monash came with us to San Remo together. We selected a spot for a small memorial and walked along the George Bass Coastal Walk to feel you. True friends are never apart, maybe in different spaces but never in heart.</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block">My dearest daughter, for a day like this we can easily be stuck in a cruel loop of grief, however, we are instead trying to manage the grief as it is far more important to remember, celebrate, and honour your beautiful life.</p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block" style="text-align:center;"><i>Softly the leaves of memory fall</i></p><p class="ql-block" style="text-align:center;"><i>Gently we gather and treasure them all</i></p><p class="ql-block" style="text-align:center;"><i>Unseen, unheard</i></p><p class="ql-block" style="text-align:center;"><i>You are always near</i></p><p class="ql-block" style="text-align:center;"><i>So missed, so loved, so very dear</i></p><p class="ql-block"><br></p><p class="ql-block">With endless love</p><p class="ql-block">Dad</p><p class="ql-block">23 May 2024</p><p class="ql-block"> </p> <p class="ql-block"><span style="color:rgb(22, 126, 251); font-size:15px;">今天是你27歲生日</span></p>